Butchered Quotes #4

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Butchered Quotes #4

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General Board of Silly Walks, Part Deux

For those within United Methodism (or even on the periphery) THAT time of year has come. Slightly more exciting than the extra day bestowed upon us every leap year is the Olympics of UMC-dom: General Conference. I know, it’s the awkward moment when you missed out on getting tickets to an event unrivaled in suspense,…

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Scars of the 90′s: Happy Meal Toys

For many of us who grew up in the 80′s there was nothing more exciting than a trip to McDonald’s. Even then we knew it wasn’t because of the food- we knew it was crap and that more than likely our parents took us there just so we would play contentedly in the PlayPlace for…

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Scars of the 90′s: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Those lovable teenage turtles who also happened to be ninjas and eat nothing but pizza (conveniently enough for Pizza Hut) became a defining icon for children in the late 80′s through the late 90′s. The original animated series itself ran for nine years, and all of us followed it religiously. After all, ninjas are cool,…

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Scars of the 90′s: It’s Educational!

In the 90′s one could justify just about anything in entertainment by claiming that it was educational. It really didn’t matter if the educational aspect was so ancillary to the show as to be negligible- if it could even remotely purport to teach us something we plopped down (or were plopped down) in front of…

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Pray Like You Mean It

When I was 19 I had just started learning guitar and was trying my hand at writing some songs. I wasn’t that good at either the guitar or songwriting, (which is probably still the case…) since most of my instrumentation was limited to a few chords and my writing to vague and purposeless lines that…

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Likewise

Words. They can aspire to the loftiest heights or wallow in the dingiest gutters. The loveliest sentiment may flow readily from the lips, followed in step by a vile and blackened curse. Gods are panegyricized, philosophical subtleties uncovered and utter nonsense made sacrosanct under their charge, as both the garrulous sage and the loquacious fool…

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Anastasis

Something strange is happening- there is a great silence on earth today, a great silence and stillness. The whole earth keeps silence because the King is asleep. The earth trembled and is still because God has fallen asleep in the flesh and he has raised up all who have slept ever since the world began….

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Easter 2012

This is a video I put together for Easter 2012. The graphics were designed by my co-worker Kathleen Sylvestri. It even got some TV time over the last few days, which I think makes this my first commercial. Pretty simple animation, but I think it turned out well.

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Scars of the 90′s: Pinky and the Brain

For most of us growing up in the 80′s and early 90′s cartoons had a fairly straightforward plot involving good and evil- the evil people were the ones trying to take over the world, while the good guys were trying to prevent that. In most cases the evildoers had no rationale involved in their efforts…

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Scars of the 90′s: Dinosaurs

Unless you lived through the 90′s as a pre-teen to early teenager, this sitcom is nearly inexplicable. In fact, probably all of the 90′s could be summarized by one phrase: We Loved Puppets. I don’t know why, but if something had a puppet in it, we ate it up. Alf. The Muppets. Fraggle Rock. Dinosaurs….

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Scars of the 90′s: Captain Planet

During our time in school we were continually educated on ways of being environmentally conscious. We were told to Give a Hoot by not polluting and to Reduce, Reuse and Recycle. Some of us would even have flushed the toilet a lot less if our parents hadn’t selfishly objected to standing pools of urine and…

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Scars of the 90′s: Sniffable Markers

For anyone who was born from 1980-1985, a single decade set in motion a chain of events that would mold our formative years like the balls of silly putty we spent hours rolling and pressing onto newspapers. Ten years that would leave wounds and scars that time could never heal. Someday we will have to…

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No More Heroes

Never did he go forth to the place of gathering, where men win glory, nor ever to war, but wasted away his own heart, as he tarried where he was; and he longed for the war-cry and the battle. In these verses of Homer we find the hero Achilles having what amounts to a temper…

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April Fool’s Day

After the conclusion of the world’s largest lottery, ever, in the history of the universe, CBS News used the following as its headline: 3 Winners, Over 100 Million Mega Millions Losers In all actuality, it should read: Over 100 Million and 3 Losers. Some of the comments by those who participated illustrate why: “What do…

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