Life


3
Apr 12

Scars of the 90′s: Sniffable Markers

For anyone who was born from 1980-1985, a single decade set in motion a chain of events that would mold our formative years like the balls of silly putty we spent hours rolling and pressing onto newspapers. Ten years that would leave wounds and scars that time could never heal. Someday we will have to tell our kids exactly what went wrong, explaining to them how we could have possibly made the choices we did.

That defining period is, of course, the 90′s.

What follows is but one of many defining aspects of this era, to which anyone 27-32 and older would still say ‘That was awesome!’

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Anyone you meet has probably experienced the sublime ecstasy of sniffing a marker. The big black sharpies, of course, are essentially the heroin of the marker sniffing world. Given the penchant of school children of all ages to partake of their wares, the marker makers evidently decided that their products were not ubiquitous enough; the ‘hard markers’ may have been too much, too soon. So they created their own gateway drug in the form of these colorful, sniffable markers.

Granted, teachers had long been accomplices in the sniffing business- children had been initiated into it via scratch and sniff stickers, ostensibly a reward for good grades. Little did we know that it was simply an entry into the harder stuff.

So parents would get their kids markers whose sole differentiating feature was that YOU COULD SNIFF THEM. They even had numerous flavors- orange, cherry, blueberry. Grape, naturally, was the flavor of choice, since it was the closest to the black markers that you really wanted to sniff. Only a few brave souls ventured into black licorice territory.

Since we all had them, it would seem society had little to no difficulty with its children SNIFFING MARKERS.

What could go wrong?


1
Apr 12

April Fool’s Day

After the conclusion of the world’s largest lottery, ever, in the history of the universe, CBS News used the following as its headline:

3 Winners, Over 100 Million Mega Millions Losers

In all actuality, it should read: Over 100 Million and 3 Losers.

Some of the comments by those who participated illustrate why:

“What do I do with this useless lottery ticket now?”

What indeed. Since you were foolish enough to buy it along with over 100 million others, there is a good chance you can find someone even more foolish than yourself who may take it off your hands. Market it as a souvenir. Or you can affix it to a wall as a perpetual monument to your idiocy.

“I knew that when I bought the ticket, that I wouldn’t win. But I did it anyhow.”

So your reasoning is that tossing money away foolishly is okay as long as you realize that you are playing the fool? I’m sure there are a number of Nigerian princesses cut off from their fortunes who will be happy for your future assistance. Look for a forthcoming email. If you don’t get it soon, check your spam filter. Continue reading →


29
Mar 12

Social Justice is Not a Virtue

Social justice is one of those terms that has always perplexed me. My exposure to it is relatively recent, (within the last six years) but it has been bandied about so frequently within the intervening time that I couldn’t help but try and sort out what is meant by it.

Which is harder than one might think. The term itself seems innocuous enough- after all, justice is (presumably) a good and desirable thing. And attaching the prefix social to it also seems harmless enough- who doesn’t want justice within the social sphere?

Initially I didn’t approach any presentation of social justice with a high degree of critical thinking. It amounted to a term that was simply floated out there with little to no definition or explication, as if it was something self-evident. Given the religious context in which I generally encounter the term, it is often employed alongside appeals to Christian ethics: feeding the poor, clothing the destitute, etc. How this makes the leap from charity to justice (and whatever is meant by social justice) is, in my experience, never sufficiently addressed or reconciled. Continue reading →


26
Mar 12

Lent, Life, and Learning to Love God

The following is a guest post by my wife Megan.

This year, I approached the Lenten season very differently than I have in the past. For the last 6 months my husband has been in and out of the hospital from intense chemotherapy and the day-to-day grind and “restrictions list” we have had to cope with seems like a grueling mile long survival guide.

When Ash Wednesday finally came about it was the day after his latest hospital stay and I was exhausted. As I contemplated Lent, all I wanted was a little comfort rather than accepting something else I would have to give up. You see, we have been living the “giving it all up” part a lot lately.

Over the course of this last year, we have lost a lot – a sort of dying – to the comforts and reassurances and general “things are going OK” feeling that life can sometimes have. I personally have had to face the reality that at the end of all of this it could mean losing everything I hold dear, everything I would consider “my life”. So, I have been forced to face the slow, reluctant, painful peeling off of each layer of life I thought I wanted and needed so very much and confront that raw and vulnerable place between just me and God. Continue reading →


7
Mar 12

Spam-A-Lot

Today I was browsing through the comments in the spam folder on my blog as I am wont to from time to time. Lately they have become rather uninteresting, as most tend to be rather lengthy ads for various products, mostly shoes and rhinestone bedazzled handbags.

However, from time to time a real gem (not a rhinestone…) of a spam comment pops up. In this particular one the robot leaving the comment seemed to be rather confused, in that it vacillated between complimenting me, disparaging my writing and accusing me of plagiarism. All in one spam comment.

Anyway, it was too delightful to not share. Here are a few of its more notable appraisals of my blog, followed by some of my snarky commentary.

I’m a long time watcher and I just believed I’d drop by and say hello there for your very first time.

Thanks for dropping by, but even more, thanks for believing that you dropped by!

I can agree with the article

As can I.

I am looking for a competent writer, long time in this area. Excellent article!

Based upon the syntax error in this sentence, how would you know when you found one?

I have read not one article on your blog. You’re a big lad

Um….

Hey, buddy, I have not figured out how to subscribe

That’s because you’re an idiot, buddy.

I am a long time ago I read your blog and has long been saying that you’re a great writer

Wow! How long ago are you?

Say “thanks” to your parents that they gave you the world

Thanks Mom and Dad!

It’s super blog, I want to be like you

Thanks, so do I. Wait, I already am… sucker!

Subscribed to your blog, thanks

I thought you couldn’t figure out how to subscribe…

I will not talk about your competence, the article simply disgusting

Agreed. Let’s not talk about my competence.

You just copied someone else’s story

Probably. History often has a way of being someone else’s story.

This is the worst article of all, I’ve read

Thank you, I said.

You are the worst writer

Indisputably so.

Thank you, this is the worst thing I’ve read

You’re welcome!

I would like to uslysht a little more on this topic

I don’t really want to know what that means…

This is a set of words, not an essay. you are incompetent

O look, a set of words!

My spouse and I stumbled over here different website and thought I should check things out.

The two of you should try not drinking so much.


11
Feb 12

Epic Beard, Epic Dulcimer

Some of my friends went in together to get me a hammered dulcimer for Christmas. That’s right, a hammered dulcimer. Pretty sweet, huh?

So I decided that the least I could was to make up a thank-you card. And what better way to say thank-you than with an epic beard?

I can’t think of any better way. Continue reading →


8
Feb 12

Lament of Faith

One of the spiritual practices that I have been engaging in over the last few months has been to utilize the Liturgy of the Hours. While I have had a passing a familiarity with this over the last few years of my life, my present health circumstances have lent a new impetus to the practice.

Much of my medication over the last few months has made it extremely difficult to concentrate and focus, which has made it challenging to read for any length of time, which has had deleterious effects on my ability to really engage the scriptures as much as I would want.

All that being said, I came across a podcast that recites the Liturgy of the Hours every day which has been an incredible blessing, since it has given me the chance to have some measure of exposure to the scriptures on a daily basis, probably even more so than I would in a normal state of life. Continue reading →


6
Feb 12

2 Year Anniversary

Today Megan and celebrated our 2 year wedding anniversary, and I have to say that it has been the best two years of my life. Even though it’s been full of lots of challenges and struggles that we could never have seen coming, I wouldn’t change it for anything and would have made the same decision in a heartbeat.

I made up this art piece based on a song I wrote for Megan a few weeks ago, just to say I Love You!


27
Jan 12

Rhetorical Probability

I always find it amusing when I am sitting in a doctor’s office during the middle of the day how the only thing on the TV is a show involving some manner of litigation. I don’t know if Judge Judy is still doing her thing, but there always seems to be some ridiculous sort of court case being televised.

Lest one think this to be something novel to our society, we have nothing on the fifth-century Athenians.

Athenians loved to litigate and argue and dispute with each other. In many ways, it was a form of entertainment, for the juries were large. (between 201 and 501 jurors) The Athenian democracy assumed that you were going to participate, and any man could speak if he wanted.

In fact, if you were involved in the litigation somehow, whether of a civil or criminal manner, you were expected to speak on your own behalf. During this period the idea of a having lawyer with a formal understanding of legal procedures and precedents was unknown. As such, one’s rhetorical ability became a rather important aspect of winning the case. Continue reading →


18
Jan 12

Oh, To Be Awake!

Oh, the pains to come awake;
to part from the fancies of dreams,
and the pleasures of rest;
only to climb out of evening’s darkness.

Oh, the burn of the sun and its rays,
Only first light, so dim compared to midday,
yet still too bright for tired eyes,
How I wish to stay and not look into the sky.

The wakers claim the day,
they speak of the purpose of their toil,
but I don’t want to trade all of my comfort,
only to suffer the joys of a waker’s light.

Don’t they know the satisfaction of a dream?
To control one’s destiny into folly or flight,
And escape with a wondrous thrill?
And to rest in the shadows of the night.

Even if I were to climb the slopes,
and agree to lay aside my rest,
Oh, the great pains I would endure;
The sacrifice I would have to make!

Yes, the light asks so very much,
to come and concede to the daybreak,
and give up all my fancies here,
and to come awake, Oh, and to come awake.

Alas – the sun – it is rising!
The brightness, it pierces me to the heart!
How quickly do my dreams break under the weight,
In a daylight so devoid of the shadows of night.

I catch my breath, as if to breathe for the very first time;
My eyes are alight with the colors of the dawn,
And oh, I come awake! Oh, to be awake!
And have not slept the day away.

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by Megan Watson